When Straight People Come Into Gay Neighborhoods

Necessity may be the Mother of Invention. But it is also proving to be the Mother of Accomodation and Tolerance. See article and comments below–

Straight Guys (No, Really—They’re Straight) Are Finding A Home In Gay Sports Leagues

by Cyd Zeigler Jr.

June 17th, 2008

Alon Hacohen had been playing football in adult leagues for years, but as guys hit their thirties, they had kids and moved to the ‘burbs. By chance, an online search for a league that played exclusively in Manhattan led Hacohen to “New York Flag Football.” A year later, he got a response—from the “New York Gay Flag Football League.”

Working in the flower industry, Hacohen, who is 36 and in a committed relationship with a girlfriend, was always comfortable around gay men, but even so . . . “I was reticent—not because it was a gay league, but I was used to a high level of play,” he recalls. “After the first pick-up game, there were guys who could really play, and I got excited.”

Hacohen was the first straight player in the league’s very first season in 2005. Now it has more than 200 members— including about a dozen straight guys who play “fag football” every season. The gay Big Apple Softball League fields some teams that are more than half straight. Estimates place the gay-bowling league at around 20 percent straight. In fact, every gay-sports league in the city probably has at least one straight player.

For the complete article go to the Village Voice.

It has been said many times that necessity is the mother of invention. It is also proving to be the mother of tolerance and accommodation. Upon reading this article, a good one, I was reminded of how this would play out just a decade or two ago,yet alone in the ancient times of lore.

More so, I thought of all the straight couples who are now moving into what are predominantly gay neighborhoods. At first it was surprising to see the appearance of strollers in such California neighborhoods as West Hollywood, in Los Angeles, and the Castro District, in San Francisco. But now it is commonplace.

Since I am a Californian I am well aware that these are not only safer neighborhoods with easy access to the markets, shops and all the other stuff we browse and buy, but these neighborhoods are well maintained. You get a lot of bang for your buck when you buy or lease housing in these neighborhoods. Small wonder straight couples are moving in with little junior. Unlike in previous years, a new generation of couples has no problem exposing young child to alternate lifestyles, namely the gay lifestyle. Most could care less and actually seem to welcome the diversity.

So on one hand you have straight athletes crossing over and playing in gay sports leagues, and here you have young couples raising their children happily in what used to be the forbidden zones. In West Hollywood in particular, you can guide your child and stroller past ever so tasteful landscaping and houses that were nicely renovated and reflective of a truly lovely environment. It seems as if there is a Pink Berry on every corner, so no child will be denied his treat.

What adds to the overall milieu are the gay couples who have for the most part adopted children, some are left over from earlier liaisons, also pushing strollers and holding hands with young toddlers as they take them shopping etc. It is also easy to find people who will work on your house, and for the most part these neighborhoods are in the city and close to employment.

So at the end of the day, if you want to live in a good neighborhood, some of the best neighborhoods are gay neighborhoods. So, hey, the necessity of finding a nurturing environment has led to tolerance and accommodation.

In a world this crazy and with all the nasty things we witness, this is truly a nice thing to see.

PC World wants your online dating yarns

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PC World is looking for online dating war stories for an upcoming Valentine’s Day article. 

“We’ve seen the happy endings, now let’s hear about the wacky hijinks . . .  You know, like the time your online date showed up with her/his/its pet ferret and kept calling her/his/its mother every five minutes”

Sounds like they really needs some good stories because these examples are horrible.  I have noticed many female 30-somethings expressing the symptoms of “eHarmony Fatigue” and are unmotivated to re-up for 3 more months.   Why?  They state that it is a lot of work!   They are tired of filling out the required online match questions  and then going out on lunch dates and Sunday dinner dates with boring guys. 

Perhaps this has addressed something that everyone is unwilling to state: the type of guy motivated to signup for eHarmony is not very interesting.  Allowing a software program to send you matches is an emasculating experience.  It is the same as getting set up by your mother; for a real man, this is not optimal.  At a most basic sub-textual level, men like the thrill of the hunt and women want to be chased.  eHarmony, while innovative, removes the danger from dating.  When you remove the danger, both men and women end up unsatisfied.